We moved Mom to Anchorage this weekend. She is adjusting well, but still wanted to come home at one point. I am not adjusting as well. I can't think of it too much because I cry. The types of questions I am being asked are exactly the type of thing I don't want to think about .. what to do if a change in health occurs; what are her wishes; what are my wishes; where I get forms to file with the facility.
Then there are the other items - like putting her on a walker now so she doesn't have to progress to a wheel chair when she weakens and how they assess her overall health on a daily basis. A long discussion ensued on how to assess her need for oxygen since her OCT tests are now posting terrible results - and never have. Should we do an exam with a pulmonary specialist?
Finally, things like general cognition, attitude, preferences .. on and on. I felt I was repeating myself again and again as a new staff member came on board. They do communicate as a group, however, as suddenly everything shifted around a request I made to have a video conference with her daily. We will visit daily for the first week, and then move to three times a week for the next few weeks, and then once a week.
I did make the right choice in so far as physical care is concerned. She will receive 24 hour, professional care. The facility is well-organized, but personable, which is why I was asked to repeat my story several times. They could glean items from me I may have forgotten with one or another. Her room is nice, really. It is institutional, but we were able to make it homey and comfortable and individual. I took her up to the top floor dining room and she had coffee and we sat and looked out over the city and inlet. It was cloudy to the east, so she didn't see the mountains so close to the city itself, but she still enjoyed it.
But it was after that visit that she didn't want me to leave and wanted to pack up a few things and go home.
I cried when I left. She is my mom and I won't see her much any more. It's hard.
